Monday, November 29, 2010

11 Ways to Cure Someday Syndrome

  • Someday Syndrome: not doing what you want to because you don’t know what it is, because you’re procrastinating about it, or because you have too much stuff getting in your way.

Everyone suffers from Someday Syndrome at some point in their lives, often catching it repeatedly. For me, most recently, I’d been saying that I really should give running a try without doing anything about it.
You probably have something similar going on in your life – a project, a task, a goal – that you just haven’t got around to doing yet. Right?
I could quote Nike and say: Just Do It, but if it were that simple Someday Syndrome wouldn’t exist. I hate suffering from Someday Syndrome. I want so much and I want it all now but slowly I am trying to train my mind that things take time and that someday can start right now. Everything I do to achieve that goal everyday is me constantly living my dreams and goals. My someday is my everyday.
1. Be you. This is The Happiness Project’s number one Happiness Commandment. If you can't be you who are you living for. Who are you doing all the hard life searching for if it is not for you. 
2. Clear out the junk. If you don’t know what would suit you better, it could be because your mind and emotions are all cluttered up. I mean, seriously, if your mind’s in chaos, how could you possibly make a clear decision on getting rid of your somedays? The clutter I’m talking about includes the negative thoughts.
3. Know what you want. And why you want it. If you are going cure Someday Syndrome, you’ll need to know details about that desire and the reasons behind it.
And if you don’t know what that is, the blogosphere is full of blogs ready to help you figure out your dreams.
4. Make a grand plan. I say “grand” because this is the big picture plan. Don’t get carried away. Planning can feel like action, but really it’s no different than talking. Until you actually do something, you’re still procrastinating.
5. Take one step at a time. The only details you need to choose at this point is first steps. I get overwhelmed by details. When I look past the big picture I don’t just see a few details – I see all of them, therefore I focus on just the next two or three things that I’m going to do.
6. Ignore the rest. That’s right. Ignore everything else in the goal except what you’re working on. We often use comparisons of where we are now to where we want to be as a form of procrastination. While checking in is always a good thing, we can do it when each small task is completed, and not in the middle of a task.
7. Get help. Daniel Gilbert in his book Stumbling on Happiness, says that the best route to figuring out if our goals will actually make us happy is to talk to others who have done it.
8. Don’t compare. Be careful when you get help, because the dream-shattering tendency to compare lurks nearby. Leo talks about the bad side to comparisons in his post: Life’s Enough. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others.
Enough said. (Yes, I’m taking my own advice about Getting Help and moving on.)
9. Be uncomfortable. Judith Sills in her book The Comfort Trap, or What If You’re Riding a Dead Horse? talks about how we might be terribly unhappy, but we’re comfortable so we don’t do anything about the unhappiness. Happiness is a risk, but the current situation even if it’s painful is safe.
Which would you prefer? Comfortably in pain and unhappy or uncomfortably blissful? I live my life the second way and would recommend that you always choose the uncomfortable option.
10. Celebrate the process as well as the end. I don’t mean celebrations like Dash’s Grade 3 “graduation ceremony” from The Incredibles. I mean acknowledge your progress. I Tweet my runs and mention them on my Facebook status. I also talk with other runners and we talk progress and tips.
And in turn this sharing inspires others and helps them move past their own Somedays and toward achieving their goals.
11. Don’t stop at the easy point. Wait a second. Most lists are only ten points. Why does this one have eleven?
Because it’s important to push yourself just a little bit further than you think you can go. 
So, while you’re celebrating and taking it one step at a time, come up with one unexpected action you can take that’ll add energy, excitement and a bit of fear to your goal.
Believe me, that bit of fear will probably be the best motivator you’ve ever found.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

What I've Learned Along The Way...

All the beautiful life lessons that I had to share with you. Check out this SlideShare Presentation:

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

How to be Successful in Life

Smell the ambition,motivation and success in the air. Johannesburg is a city built on dreams. Built on ideas that where not scared to take the first step. Everything in this city gives you the opportunity to be yourself and live the life you want. There is definitely a word for Johannesburg, South Africa its called Passion. People need it, people look for it cause when you are hungry success is sure to follow. 

I build my profession in Johannesburg. Working like a slave for TV productions and Commercial companies and loved it. I am Tv/Film Director because of this city. If you are not ambitious and living in Johannesburg, you are wasting your time. I have been gone for almost a year but you never lose that ballzy- guts and confidence that comes with Joburg.

The famous Jozi Skyline.

Expect Success
The first thing you need to do is change your mindset to that of a successful person. This means that you should begin to expect to achieve things in your life. You deserve success, and you need to remind yourself of this fact every day. Not only do you deserve it, but you are, in fact, entitled to it, and it is coming your way--it is only a matter of time! If you convince yourself of this, it will be nearly impossible for you to fail.
Now, make a list of the things you want. Do you want to make more money, or change your career? Do you want to get married? Whatever your goals, write them down and then read what you have written. Then tell yourself that you can have these things, and most importantly, that you will.

Success will not lower its standard to us. We must raise our standard to success. - Rev. Randall R. McBride, Jr.

Once you are confident in your ability to be successful, start acting to initiate the changes in your life that you want to see. If you want a better job, start looking every day, or enroll in classes that will help you get it. If you want love, throw yourself headlong into the dating scene. Immerse yourself in the things that will help you achieve success. Remember, time passes quickly, and if you do not take action now to pursue your goals, you may lose the chance to live up to your dreams.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal. – Henry Ford

Have Determination
Do not be discouraged if things don’t immediately go your way. Though it may seem like people achieve success overnight, the truth is that most successful people have worked very hard to get where they are. Have patience, and do not lose your drive. With confidence and determination, you will become successful.
Success is a journey, not a destination. – Ralph Arbitelle

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

8 Friends Every Women Needs

Essential Friendships 
You know that close friendships feel good, but did you know just how much of a health boost they can be? According to a 10-year study of older people in Adelaide, Australia, satisfying friendships predict longevity better than even close family ties, and they can protect against obesity, depression, and heart disease, among other health problems. “When women get stressed, our instinct is often to find a friend and talk things through,” says Joan Borysenko, PhD, author of “Inner Peace for Busy Women.” “Both touch and talk release the hormone oxytocin, which has a profoundly calming effect on your mind and body.”

You don’t need 600 Facebook friends or a jam-packed social calendar to reap these impressive perks (in fact, both can backfire). Research shows the following “types” of relationships are especially potent for your health. Here’s how to cherish these friendships and make sure you stay close for the long haul.

A Childhood Friend 
She can still remember the boy-crazy, artistic girl you were at 16.

Longtime intimates are special for many reasons. They knew you and your family while you were growing up and likely have many memories and stories of you that no one else does. "These friends remind you that you are still the person you've always been," says Rebecca G. Adams, PhD, a leading friendship researcher and sociology professor at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro.

Nurture these ties by starting a members-only Web site — groups on Yahoo, Google, or Facebook are free and make it easy. Use them to plan vacations or share links to digital photo albums. Or keep things low tech — just stick a card in the mail now and then, and stay in touch with phone calls. Research from the University of Notre Dame shows that people who chat at least every 15 days have the best chance of staying close over time.

A New Friend 
Unlike members of your grade school crew, newly acquired pals have no preconceived notions about you.

"As we get older, we can fall into ruts," says Pamela McLean, PhD, a psychologist in Santa Barbara, CA. "New friends ignite different kinds of thinking and fresh ways of being." What's more, they'll connect you to another network of people, says Rosemary Blieszner, PhD, a professor at Virginia Tech who has researched friendships among older women. That network can be helpful if you’re looking to make a career change or find a new pool of potential dates.

Find new friends at the office, befriend your kids’ friends’ parents, or try new activities, like that Zumba class at the gym.

A Workout Friend 
She’ll drag you out for a jog on days when you’d rather be parked on the couch.

Experts agree that exercising — whether walking, golfing, or salsa dancing — is one of the most important things you can do for your physical and mental health and longevity. And a good friend may be the glue that makes this healthy habit stick. A University of Connecticut study of 189 women ages 59 to 78 found that strong social support was key to maintaining a new exercise regimen for 1 year.

Video: Which friends will help you live longer?

For best results, set a joint exercise goal together — whether it’s going for a neighborhood walk 4 days a week or running a 5K. It's the best way to boost the get-healthy payoff of a workout partner because neither of you is poking and prodding the other, which is a recipe for resentment, says Marcia G. Ory, PhD, a researcher at Texas A&M Health Science Center.

A Spiritual Friend 
Being part of a spiritual community — not necessarily an organized religion — helps people stay resilient, research shows.

A study from Duke University Medical Center found that people who regularly attended religious services or engaged in activities such as prayer, meditation, or Bible study had a 50% lower risk of dying over a 6-year period than others of the same age and health status.

That's not to say it's easy to forge a connection in a room of 300 worshippers or while meditating on your own. Seek more intimate opportunities at a local church or temple: Volunteer in a canned food drive campaign, or attend a lecture series. Or try a neighborhood yoga center or community college; they often offer spiritually meaningful courses.

A Younger Friend 
How did you juggle your full-time job and three kids? Your 10-years-younger friend really wants to know.

Research shows that an essential element of a happy life is to nurture and feel useful to others — by cooking a wholesome meal, say, or passing on what you've learned through experience. For many women, that itch gets scratched by raising children. But mentoring younger friends (from the office, for example) can give you that same feeling, Blieszner says.

To maximize the benefits of this friendship, let advice flow in both directions. A younger confidante can explain the social networking site du jour or offer a fresh take on current events.

Your Partner’s Friends 
Becoming tight with your husband’s pals is good for your marriage.

The more a couple's family and friends intermingle, the happier spouses are after even just 1 year of marriage, found one study that examined the social circles of 347 couples. "We were surprised," says researcher Kenneth Leonard, PhD, a professor of clinical psychology at SUNY Buffalo. "Including your spouse in your network of friends is nearly as important for marital happiness as making them feel they are a part of your family."

Your Mom 
About 85% of adult women say they have a good relationship with their mother, according to a Pennsylvania State University study.

Despite the inevitable conflicts between grown moms and daughters, the relationships are generally strong, supportive, and close. "There is great value in this bond because mothers and daughters care so much for one another," says study author Karen L. Fingerman, PhD. If you’d like to be closer but run into the same roadblocks over and over, here’s some advice to overcome the most common issues.

• You find it hard to enjoy time with mom: Stop trying to change her, and focus on what you do enjoy, says Fingerman.

• You keep clashing over the same old issues: The women who had the strongest relationships didn't take the conflicts personally. Instead, they tended to see criticism as a reflection of their mother's habits or traits.

• The relationship feels too close for comfort: Daughters who did the best with this accepted that their mothers wanted more time together. Instead of telling their moms what they couldn't do, these daughters focused on when they could get together and what they could do for their mothers.

If you’re like a lot of women, you’d drop everything to help a friend in need — but often don’t pay yourself the same respect.

So, how does one befriend herself, exactly? It starts with self-knowledge, says Prevention advisor Pamela Peeke, MD, MPH, an assistant clinical professor of medicine at the University of Maryland. “Getting to know yourself is an amazing adventure,” she says. “Think of what makes you fall in love with someone: how genuine, sincere, and caring they can be; the unconditional love they offer, no matter what. Doesn't that describe how you should feel about yourself?”

Peeke recommends you repeat the following mantra as a reminder: "I love and honor myself as I do the other important people in my life." To give yourself the TLC you deserve, write down seven things that make you feel happy and healthy (cooking dinner, talking to a friend, running, reading a book), and make sure you do at least one every day.

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Tuesday, November 16, 2010

My beautiful South Africa

8 Things You Might Not Have Known About South Africa
Just landed in beautiful sunny South Africa. I could be the happiest person in the world right now. JOY! 
Here are some great fact about South Africa.
  1. The world’s first heart transplant was performed in Cape Town at Groote Schuur Hospital in 1967 by Dr. Christiaan Barnard. In addition to having performed the first heart transplant, he also performed the first heart/lung transplant. The donor of the first heart transplant was a white girl who also had her kidneys donated to a black recipient, which was extremely controversial at the time.
  2. South Africa is by far the largest producer to strategic minerals. It produces 90% of the platinum, 80% of the manganese, 73% of the chrome, 45% of the vanadium, and 41% of the gold.
  3. The two biggest man made holes in the world were excavated in South Africa. The Big Hole in Kimberly and the Jagersfontein Mine are both gigantic, open pit diamond mines. Both mines were designed to extract diamonds from underground Kimberlite Pipes which come from the mantle of the Earth.
  4. South Africa is home to the world’s largest bird (ostrich), largest mammal (bull elephant), smallest mammal (dwarf shrew), largest reptile (leatherback sea turtle: 1500 pounds), largest earthworm (African Giant Earthworm), fastest animal (cheetah), tallest animal (giraffe), and the largest fish (whale shark).
  5. The second highest waterfall in the world is in South Africa: Tugela Falls. It checks in at 948m, 31m less than Angel Falls in Venezuela.
  6. The best example of a living fossil was found in South Africa in 1938: the Coelacanth. The fish was thought to be extinct since the Devonian period and is considered the linked between fish and tetropods.
  7. In 1879, the largest defeat of an army with gunpowder to an army without guns occurred in South Africa. 1,400 British troops were defeated by 30,000 Zulu warriors armed primarily with spears and shields. Over 1,000 British were killed (71%) vs 3,000 Zulus (10%).
  8. South Africa has 11 official languages: Afrikaans, English, Ndebele, Pedi, Sotho, Swazi, Tsonga, Tswana, Venda, Xhosa and Zulu.
What other interesting things about South Africa do you know? Has anyone else traveled there or planning a trip soon?

Monday, November 15, 2010

9 Signs You're Happier than You Think

Your emotional well-being isn’t just about your genes or the kind of home you were raised in. It turns out that some pretty interesting factors—backed by science—play a role in how joyful you feel:

You were a Smiley Student
Adults with the biggest grins in their college yearbook pictures were up to 5 times less likely to be divorced decades later than those who looked less happy, according to a new DePauw University study. A smiler’s positive disposition may attract other happy people or rub off on a spouse. So
Don't Forget to Smile.

You have a Sister
 People with at least one female sibling report better social support, more optimism, and better coping abilities, according to a study presented at the British Psychological Society’s annual conference. Sisters appear to encourage communication and cohesion in families. I am glad I have a  sister because she is a constant reminder that I have to be a good person.  I want her to have the best of everything and I want the world to be kind to her. 

Tribute to my Sister

You're not Glued to the TV
 The happiest people spend 30% less time parked in front of the tube, according to a University of Maryland study that analyzed 34 years of data from more than 45,000 Americans. They’re more likely to spend time socializing, reading, or attending religious services—habits that are linked to better moods and health.

You keep Souvenirs on Display
 People who use mementos or photos to remind themselves of good times better appreciate their lives and are happier, says Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD, a professor of psychology at University of California, Riverside. Good memories remind you of your “happiness potential” and promise that soon you can reach it again.

You make Exercise a Priority
 People who exercise more are less likely to be stressed and more likely to be satisfied with life, according to Danish researchers. Compared with sedentary people, joggers are 70% less likely to have high stress levels and life dissatisfaction, the study found. Couch potatoes who start moderate exercise—the equivalent of 17 to 34 minutes a day—experience the greatest happiness lift.
How to Lose weight having Sex

You have a healthy love life
 Physical intimacy is a key contributor to happiness, found a study by Dartmouth economist David Blanchflower, PhD, and Andrew Oswald, PhD, of England's University of Warwick. Married people report 30% more sex than singles, which may be one reason they also report being happier.

Sex: The Art of love making

You Hang Out with Happy People
Socializing with a cheerful person in your neighborhood increases the likelihood that you’ll be happy too, according to a new study. How often you get together matters most, say the researchers: People who live within half a mile of a buoyant buddy increase their odds of being happy by 42%. If the friend lives farther away (within a 2-mile radius), the chances drop to 22%—probably due to fewer get-togethers.

You stay warm with hot cocoa
 Clutching a steaming beverage—coffee and tea also do the trick—can elicit a flood of positive feelings, according to a Yale University study. This may be because people associate physical warmth with emotional warmth, say the researchers. Study subjects held cups of either hot or iced coffee; those gripping warm mugs were more appreciative of friendliness in others and also felt more generous and trusting themselves.

You have two best friends
 Among 654 married adults, those who said they had at least two “best friends” (not necessarily including one’s spouse) were likelier to have better mental well-being, says a study. But additional friends didn’t lead to any more happiness than just a pair.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Success Habit Tips from Arnold Schwarzenegger

Bodybuilding world champion numerous times. One of the most highly paid actors in the last few decades. And now the governor of California. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s resume sounds more like the resume of three men rather than just one. How did he do it?

Here are a five clues, success habits and tips from Arnold himself.

1. Believe in yourself.
“I knew I was a winner back in the late sixties. I knew I was destined for great things. People will say that kind of thinking is totally immodest. I agree. Modesty is not a word that applies to me in any way – I hope it never will.”

“We all have great inner power. The power is self-faith. There’s really an attitude to winning. You have to see yourself winning before you win. And you have to be hungry. You have to want to conquer.”

“The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent.”

A very strong belief in yourself can be ridiculously useful.
Corny as it may sound, your belief in yourself determines a lot about your journey and your results. But the problem with statements like “Just believe in yourself, man!” is that they don’t come with any practical instructions on how to actually believe more I yourself. So you have a hard time getting anywhere.I have found a few things that have been helpful. 

First, by realizing that you are able to handle negative stuff that comes your way your belief in yourself and your capabilities grows. You can also work on a similar process voluntarily. By setting goals and achieving them your belief in yourself increases. And by facing your fears and finding that you can indeed survive such experiences your belief in yourself goes up too. None of these options may sound that glamorous, fun or quick. And a lot of the time they aren’t. But like with so much else,you have to put in effort to get good results.

But there is also another side to this challenge. Quite a bit of the problem with a lack of belief in yourself comes from internal self-sabotage, self-limiting beliefs and resistance within your mind. It’s you holding yourself back. I have found that reading Eckhart Tolle’s books like “A New Earth” – or books on mindfulness in general I guess – to help you realize that you are not your ego, thoughts or emotions and rereading to strengthen and deepen that belief can be very helpful to reduce the inner struggle, over-analyzing and self-sabotage.

Over time you can get better control over your mind and you´ll stop listening so much to your own negative inner voices and emotional resistance.
Having a reasonably good handle on that part makes it easier to see yourself doing what you want to do. Because, as Arnold says, you have to be able to envision what you want to do or it will be very hard or just impossible bring that vision into reality.

By getting better control over your mind it becomes easier to hold this vision in your mind day after day, week after week. You’ll be less prone to self-sabotage. And your belief will waver less when being questioned or worse by other people or just society in general.

2. See struggle and failure as something positive.
“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.”

Failure is seldom the end of the world. It’s a part of the journey, a part of the learning curve. The problem is just that if you have a scarcity mentality then every failure or potential failure may seem as the sky falling. This can hold you back from performing well. Or from taking action at all. The key to overcome this is to develop an abundance mentality that tells you that there are always more opportunities. This allows you to not take the setbacks too seriously.

One way to help yourself to develop such a mentality is to replace some of the usual input – news, advertising – with information and the vibe from personal development authors/speakers. Another way is just to hang out more with people with an abundance mentality. Or just people that are positive and enthusiastic about life.
Now, most of the time you only really fail when you give up and surrender. If you keep going you’ll build your inner strength to live and move through rough patches. And if you are able to look at your setbacks and learn from them you can also deepen you knowledge, perhaps avoid some mistakes and find a better course towards your goal.
Remember that to succeed you need those failure. They make you stronger and smarter and that build-up of yourself is vital to success.

3. Go the extra mile.
“The last three or four reps is what makes the muscle grow. This area of pain divides the champion from someone else who is not a champion. That’s what most people lack, having the guts to go on and just say they’ll go through the pain no matter what happens.”
Going the extra mile. It’s not easy. Personally I think this has often been because I have just thought too much. Overthinking often leads to negative thought spirals where you use your mind to decrease your own strength through self-doubt. And if you add up all the overthinking you can waste months or perhaps even years of your life.
It’s more useful to just stop thinking when all then thinking that is needed is done. And to then just go and do what you choose to do. And then to learn from your experiences and to keep going.

4. Go work out.
“Training gives us an outlet for suppressed energies created by stress and thus tones the spirit just as exercise conditions the body.”
Yep, working out is very useful in more than one way. I have found that one of the best ways to turn an anxious, negative or weak mood fully around is simply to go exercising. It is also reliable because it is not so dependent on your mind. You just have to drag yourself wherever you need to go and make your body do certain movements to get the desired result.
And, anyway, how are you going to be able to go the extra mile without extra energy? Over the last few years I realized that many problems are simply based in a lack of energy. So working out or not isn’t much of a choice really. If you aren’t naturally a bouncy, high energy person then you have to exercise in some way to create that energy you need to achieve whatever it is you want in life.

5. Go and help others.
“Help others and give something back. I guarantee you will discover that while public service improves the lives and the world around you, its greatest reward is the enrichment and new meaning it will bring your own life.”
Helping others is valuable in so many ways. Beside the wonderful upsides that Arnold brings up – like the fact that you are helping people out and at the same time enriching and adding meaning to your own life – you also create a lot of relationships.
And the Law of Reciprocity, the urge to give back is strong in people. If you provide value and help to them then they will often be inclined to give you a hand when you need it. Or feel the need give back by paying it forward and helping other people.
This creates big, expanding upward spirals of positive actions and thoughts. And that can be very useful for us all.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Bag and Heel is Online

I just could not help it. I just had to share the next best thing next to Wisdom--- SHOES. 
Oh yes, Glorious, Beautiful, ever so Divine.
BagandHeel is your Online Personal Fashion Shopping Advisor Blog. I search for all the good deals on the World Wide Web and all you have to do is keep informed and be a happy Shopper.
I love fashion but I adore shoes. My heart quickens at their sight. I hope yours does too.
I look forward to seeing and sharing with you on Twitter , FaceBook, and BagandHeel

Thanks for all your support on Girlondaloose. I will continue to share beautiful life lessons that inspire and encourage everyone to live their lives to the fullest.
Go with Peace, Go with Love

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Why You are Unsuccessful

What Is Success?
Success is having all that you wanted to have. It's finding that you have achieved your goals or fulfilled your plans and it's waking up in the morning feeling victorious rather than feeling beaten up. Success is walking proudly in the streets with your head up high while being happy and satisfied.

How to Be Successful in Life?
Contrary to common beliefs, there are no successful or unsuccessful people, instead there are just people who have the potential to succeed and do things that realize this potential, and people with the same potential who don’t do those things. The only thing you need to do to succeed is doing exactly what successful people do and this is the main aim of this guide. When you go through all of the pages you will acquire the mentality of a successful person and that alone will be the basis for your success.

What Makes Me Unsuccessful?
If you really want to be successful then you should have a solid understanding of certain concepts that can limit your potential and make you unsuccessful. Successful people avoid these harmful concepts and so should you:

False Beliefs: False beliefs are incorrect ideas you hold about something or about yourself. An example of a false belief could be “I can never find a job in such a country” . False beliefs act as limiters to your true potential and so to your success. Getting rid of false beliefs and knowing more about them is the most important task that you should do if you are serious about success. False beliefs can not only limit your success potential but they can even ruin your life, some people stay broken for years after a breakup just because they had some false beliefs about love that they acquired from the media.

External Locus of Control: This is the way of thinking that makes a person assume that everything that happens to him is due to external factors. For example: saying an exam was too hard when you don't do well or claiming high unemployment is the reason you can't find a job. The flip side to that is Internal Locus of Control which is thinking that you are in charge and in control of everything that happens to you. None who are successful have an external locus of control, so if you are serious about success you should learn how to change your way of thinking from having an external locus of control to having an internal locus of control. 

Lack of Persistence: What good is it to have many qualities and skills if you lose hope after failing once or twice? The only people who succeed in life are the persistent, those who continue working right to the end until they get what they want, even if everything was against them and even if they fail many times. 

Lack of Flexibility: Flexibility is the ability to adapt to external conditions, it's the ability to try something else or another method when your current method fails. The more flexible you are, the more you will become adaptable and the higher chances of success you'll have. 

Lack of Planning: If you don’t have goals or plans then you are going to be a part of other people's plans. If you don’t plan to be the team leader at your work then someone else in your team will do and if you don't plan to get that high paying job someone else who planned and worked for it will take it from you. If you don’t plan you will get swept away by the people who do. They will fill the positions, make the money and get the fame while you'll just be a spectator, as such, planning is an essential item in the success toolkit. 

Lack of Self-confidence: If you don't have self-confidence then probably you will be too shy of presenting your ideas and you may give up your dreams as soon as someone tells you that they are not possible. You may fear taking any risks and so ignore many opportunities that could have made you successful. If you want to increase your chances of being a successful person, then you must build your self-confidence. You can build it from scratch using the ultimate guide for building self-confidence.

Thinking that you lack resources: In my book How i did it i explained how i managed to make a website that generates thousands of dollars/month in less than 2 years with an initial investmentthat is less than 50 dollars!! Don't fool yourself by thinking that you lack resources because if you are serious about success, you will do it without having any resources. This website is one of the examples of successful business that required no resources at the start up. 

Success related Fears: I am not talking about normal fears, but the types of fears that can affect your ability to succeed are fear of failure and fear of success. While they both seem to be complete opposites still they do have the same effect on you, which is preventing you from trying and so leading you to failure.

unknown source ( but I will look into it and give the reference. A Great post that has truly changed my mindset today for my tomorrows)

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Nelson Mandela's Speech

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
The above speech by Nelson Mandela was orignally written by Marianne Williamson who is the author of other similar material.”
The above speech by Nelson Mandela indicates a man who over nearly 40 years in prison, thought deeply, read much and tried his best to understand human nature. In the course of that journey he developed a firm belief in God and by doing so, learned love for man followed by sensitivity, compassion and an attempt at understanding all as well as the roles they played in his life.
If we actually look at some of the things he talks about. For instance he clearly says, our deepest fears is that we are too powerful and not nearly as inadequate as we profess. For many of us this is a contradiction, simply because for most of us our greatest fear is that we are inadequate, helpless and of no consequence in the grand scheme of life. That is our negativity which is self-destructive. He goes on to talk about the light. The light he refers to comes from the soul within, that all of us have. He specifically refers to love and hope leading us forward towards ever continuing growth and understanding of ourselves and accordingly, others around us. For without hope, life is darkness. Darkness is fear and bigotry, the road to self-destruction and denial of all our human virtues. If severe enough, it leads to our soul going to sleep for self protection.

Monday, November 8, 2010

6 Ways to Be Productive at Work

You spend 8 plus hours a day at your desk juggling phone calls, emails and correspondences. Yet the stack of paper on your cluttered desk keeps growing taller, you eat more meals at the office than you do at home and you are still barely meeting your deadlines. Find ways to avoid time traps and to improve existing processes to be not only more productive at work, but much less stressed.

Don't let a long and tiresome day slow you down and keep you unmotivated. You have a goal to achieve that will benefit you in the long run. 6 Ways to Saty Motivated at Work An effective goal-setting routine is a great way to keep yourself in a good attitude about finishing things. Set little goals for yourself throughout your working routine, as well as bigger goals to work toward. This will make staying productive fun, easy, and even more productive.

1. Relax
Don’t get stressed out about your work. Handle the situation maturely and positively by staying calm while getting things done. Your life is important, so don’t waste your time and enjoyment worrying about the little things. Don't sweat the small stuff.

2. Stay Focused
Stay away from the gremlins called Time-wasters. Common culprits are instant messaging, web surfing, personal phone calls and chitchat with co-workers. The minutes spent on these distractions can become hours of lost time and lost productivity. Set limits on these activities and find ways to politely end conversations.
3. Prioritize your Tasks
* What I must do now
* What I must do later
* How much time will each of these tasks take?

It’s important through this routine to stay happy and not become a workaholic, because that defeats the purpose of personal growth through productivity. Be sure to priortize your work and give yourself some downtime. However, don’t put down an important task while you’re still in the middle of it. Finish, and then relax.

4. Stay Organized
Organization and productivity go hand in hand. If you are constantly searching for items on your cluttered desk. It is time to make some room on your desk.
  • remove all supplies and gadgets that you don't use every day
  • toss out ancient history on your bulletin board
  • clean out old Post-its on your computer
  • uncover your horizontal surfaces
  • clear off credenzas, tables, the tops of bookshelves
If you’re the type of person that keeps a clean desk and living area, then chances are you’re the type of person that gets things done efficiently and effectively.

5. To Do List
Make your own working schedule. We are all different and we work differently too. Making your own work schedule will give you the power over situations and keep you on track. This is a good way to ensure that you always have something to do and don't waste any time looking for your next task. Write all your upcoming tasks on this list. At the end of the day, prepare a to-do list for the following day so that you can start working as soon as you get to the office. Keep the list handy and be sure to cross off tasks that you've finished; you'll find satisfaction in knowing that something is completed.

6. Stay Healthy and Enjoy What You are Doing
No one can be productive if they’re sick or feeling crumby, right? Keep your body healthy by keeping a good diet and healthy living. Healthy habits can not be accomplished with out a healthy attitude.  So think Positive. Recognize your weakness and strengths at work and use your best attributes to be successful and unbeatable. And for goodness sake enjoy what you do. There is no point putting in all this effort in something you despise. Love what you do and be happy. That's the point of life.

Friday, November 5, 2010

How to Overcome Jealousy

If you want to learn to overcome jealousy, you will need to come to terms with a number of things.

The first thing is that beating jealousy is not impossible. The second thing is that you probably can't do it all on your own, you will need a support system. Whether you find the support you need to overcome your jealousy from friends, or from various groups, it is something that you should seriously consider, because without it, you are likely to find it a long road.

Jealousy is like holding on to a horrible grudge. Starts off small then turns into a terrible unstoppable monster capable of doing things that out of your character. You deserve to be happy- Let is go.

Stop comparing Yourself with Others.
Why should you compare yourself to others, just because he can do thing better then you doesn’t means you’ll be able to do that yourself. You can easily end up being a miserable human if you keep your ego feeding with jealous thoughts. 
Usually jealously stems into our minds if there is a sense of insecurity. You need to understand who you are and know that you are exactly who you are supposed to be. Loving yourself is the ultimate key that will free yourself from the constant hate and jealousy. 

If you really want to compare, just compare you with yourself. Look at your achievements, your life, look back at things that matter to you most. If you can do this you’ll feel much better, emotionally, mentally.

Meditating away of Jealous Thoughts
If your mind is clogged with many things, it can easily bring up negative. A stable mind can think and reason about things. Meditating is the best way to make your mind let go of jealousy. Meditate on things like love, spirituality, nature; try diverting your mind from the negative thoughts. Just half an hour a day will surely help getting your head right for the day. Train your mind. Inner Peace

Try avoiding negative people. Cut-down on the influence of negative peoples. If you encounter negative people and can’t avoid them just make sure you don’t intake there thoughts. Think of negative peoples as disposable plates (throw after use)

Talk your Jealousy through with a Friend.
Confess yourself about your jealousy with a close friend or a loved one. I’m sure it will lighten your heart. But make sure your friend is no Darth Sidious.
You have become jealous! Realize it. Deal with it.

Realizing that you have become jealous probably is the best way to overcoming your jealous feelings. That a long hard looks at yourself, and scan your thoughts, feelings, attachments and see if you have really become jealous. But denial will end you up at the same door.

Jealousy can be so heavy as you drag it around it around with it all day. It will neither make the situation better nor make you any happier. Acknowledge that you are jealous. Shout, scream and talk about it if you need too. Then... get over it. You have better things to do with your life that obsess about hating someone. You deserve to be happy. 

Let me know if you have encountered jealousy and how you overcame it.